wud i can say?

ok..finally he come back..but how i knw? i saw his friend online...then i wait lo..see whether he will contact me or not? then he din...

until 8.15pm i call him...i ask him where is he..he say at home..i ask him y din contact me...he say busy for clean his car..zz...then i say when he reach cant contact me merh...he say HP NO CREDIT!!! (actually he can use msn, his mom hp to call or msg me ma....)

when i ask he...i knw he got a bit angry..then i say ok la..then i put down the call...

now..i cant control my tearz..

few minue later..he online~zz he sent: ya? then i ask lo...why when he go brunei won sent a msg or call me? why only when he din come back then just knw contact me? why he din contact me when he reach here?

why i wan he contact is..ya! honesty i love him...and other reason is...i WORRY ABOUT HIM!!!!! y he cant understand?

i really few that i am super hyper idiot..stupid @.@

friend i am ok! don worry. i will let everything gone!

t.t

today...morning..my hp is off...coz of no batery..n oso becoz don wan open!! he go brunei...i scare i will call he..n he will say o distrub he! actually..i wan to go...but he say..my passport is expired..n expensive for renew..n i oso din go other place to play..so no need go....but..~ s the money is from he???

but i din fight with him tht i wan go...

then he say he will come back today...

wud at last...when i having dinner with my family at outside...a private number call me...is he,,guess wud he say?? though he will say he reach miri oledi, but..he say he will stay there...coz friend car broke down...but stil got other friend's car he can follow...but HE DON WAN!!! wtf.

that time i relly wan to shout n scry n score...but at last..i din...i just say ok.
but guys....u knw how is my feeling?

Christie is gone

my mood go back like last time...suddenly feel down...the reason is...

~ when i waN to do something that is serious and important...they wont give me support or sugguest....only will say i won reach it! damn...man...i do wud u guys wan...so i change...but then?

actually this few dayz i worry n planning for my degree...then i ask mom n dad...but?? thier respone is...nothing special!!! just now i go out with my mom n my bro...we talk about this...but?? when it's my turn to discuss about my degree...my mom look like don care...but when it's my bro turn?? she keep ask this n that!!! dam!!! @.@

~ma, dad...i am ur daughter too...plz be fair..i really grow up oledi..i knw wud i should do..so..i plan it earlier..but?? wud respone u guys give me?
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n he?? last few day i ask he, where he wan do continue his degree..he say:"y? if i tell u , so u can plan to go together with me right??" omg..suddenly i feel like we r not couple....i ask him, the reason is not really will follow him...is coz i really wan to knw...and if can follow is better...coz got someone can take care of u. but wud he think is...i cant life without him.

~david, in other way to ask...y actually u don like me to follow u? and y u so scare i will follow?? y other ppl will accept...

i just wish that if we can toghter..then i will have someone take care me..
beside that...i scare that the uni u go is far from mine,,so how?
u oso not believe distance love la~~so????

sometime u make me blur. i don knw wud u like me? or y u like me...coz u owes complain this n that,...seriouly n honestly...for me..may be u r worse than me u knw?? but i din complain u...coz i love u...nature u...not a david that i need to change.

hai ya...don knw la...may be...GOD plan to let me n he go for different place to study n testing us...but how? i really not trust distance love.

my feeling now is..DAMN,...wanna shout, cry...n hope that got someone can hug me. someone promise me to take care of me n protact me. The someone sure is he...

but? wud i wish is i wish!! still need to see he wan or not...that is still his choise... ;< T.T

memorzz when prom nite of riam tek

prom nite 2007 is pass long time oledi...but, y i stil wan to upload?? coz no reason..hehe...

before we go prom nite~~choosing, choosing

the picture from here, is taken when the girl of my class, choosing wud we wan to wear~~~
that time i really don knw wud to wear, and don knw how to choose...so..i just follow wud my friend suggest lo...

have fun...

picture when we in class, sem 3

most of the picture i taken by me!! hehe...some f the picture really funny!!1hahah

boring day!!

so boring at home!! msn someone..he oso no hew me!! so...wud i can do??
suddenly i view my old pic...hehe...so..i upload it..haha...friend..sorry~~

here is some pictures that taken when we at lecture hall...

;<

HMM...just come back from outside...just now go church with darling n then go play game....

the way i go church...my mom keep say that say this...haiz...coz the way from my house to church is far...wud i feel is...unfair...coz she wil allow my bro to pick his gf go to her sis house...u knw...it is more far...!!!! but my mom din score...then me??? she keep say that say this..

damn...u knw wud?? my heart broken...coz..i really feel that my mom is unfair..n..she won reach or do wud she promise!! and she simply hink other ppl!!!!

damn...mom...me oso ur daughther...y u treat me different when u treat ah bi?? wud u say is rubbish...wud u promise u will say u din say!!!!
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after church..i go playgame with my bf at cyblecafe,,, i just come back from there..i don wan he go back to play again...but he still wan...duh!!! now oledi 1am!!! and the game they play atleast need one hour!!

but...wud i can say?? u r my bf?? i love u? i scare u! wud else i can do??

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suddenly feel that no one care about me..no one understand me! no one care about my feel....#crying#

i knw i am stupid..but..i wan be myself..i need ppl care, ppl hug, ppl accompany!!!!
I AM A GIRL...I GIRL EASY GET HURT!! PLZ...PLZ...I DON WAN CRY!!!Y U ALL MUST MAKE MY TEAR COME OUT!!! I JUST WAN TO BE A STRONG N USEFUL GIRL!!!!!